Hello, dear one.
I’ve been watching you for a while on social media, reading your replies to my blogs, and meditating over your painful email confessions to me.
As I read them, I try and picture you as a small child, holding up hearts and homes. Holding out for the hope of a better future.
I see you carrying too much, even then.
Too many fears.
Too much shame.
Too many expectations.
Too much pain.
I see you standing back surveying, figuring out what you’re up against, trying to decide if you have one more fight left in you.
You feel humiliated for anyone to see you weak or tired. But you’re completely overwhelmed from far too much for far too long.
And so, I think, something in you has just come to empty... all that you have so long held has drained you, and you need time to let God work some of His grace and His strength back in.
You deserve a rest and a release.
Don’t skip over that last line: You (yes, you) deserve a rest and a release.
For whatever reason, you can’t hold it all anymore.
So, set it down.
You can’t do it all. So, don’t try.
Instead, what would it feel like to let yourself grieve about how hard your suffering has been? What is it like to say to yourself, “Of course I’m angry. Who wouldn’t be? None of this is fair.”
Can you release yourself from the pressure to always see life through rose-colored glasses? To not always pretend that life is cheery and bright?
What might it feel like to tell someone the truth? To tell...yourself...the truth?
The universe is not yours to hold, just this moment and a whole lot of grace.
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